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When To Move From Online Dating To Meeting In Person

When you discover a great match on dating website,, the joy comes from exchanging and receiving messages. Finding out more about your new crush can be exciting, and once you have formed a connection and you’re sure the feeling is mutual, it’s time to meet. But what is the dating etiquette during transition from online dating to meeting in person.

While there is never a hard and fast rule about when to meet after online dating, there have been several studies undertaken to find out the best time to move from online to in person, especially since this is a growing phenomenon. In fact, with looking for love online being the norm and around 35-50% of couples meeting via the web it is now more important than ever that we find out how to succeed at online dating and finding love.

While witty messages and flirtatious chatting can make you feel like you have got a connection with someone, but the truth is you won’t if that’s real until you meet up in person. Hiding behind messaging services, email and video calls make you feel safe and secure, but it seems that the longer you wait, the more you will have built the person and the date up and that can leave it to fall flat and disappoint the both of you.

Do Your Homework

Many things can get in the way of the first meet, nerves and shyness are common, but work and mismatching schedules may also play a factor. Those new to the online arena may suffer concerns and not want to meet someone soon, and that’s ok too. Everyone during this period should be making sure that they use the time carefully, and that is by conducting some research on your match, as safety should always come first.

One of the ways you can find out more about your new crush is to see if you share any mutual friends on social media sites, and if you do, use your friends as a screening technique, this could save you so much time in the long run. Social media can also help you to check that they are verified genuine singles too!

Another thing to do in this time is to read the messages that they send you carefully and check if anything they say makes you feel uncomfortable. Uncomfortableness can come in many ways such as those who seem to pry on you for excessive details or perhaps sending you unwanted vulgar or overly sexual messages. As soon as you feel comfortable and have a good rapport, now is the time to meet, if at any point you don’t feel comfortable, cease communication altogether.

When Is The Magic Window?

Research recently conducted and published in the Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication suggest that the best time to meet your match from the dating website is between 17 and 23 days after sending the first message. The study used 433 verified singles using dating sites and found that the longer they waited to meet their love interest, the more likely they were to feel let down. The 17-23-day mark seemed to be the golden window as at this point, interest levels have peaked, and you’ll feel more positive about meeting someone.

Ultimately messaging online serves the purpose of giving you a solid base of knowledge about someone. Online messages are, essentially, fact finding, learning about likes and dislikes, favourite films, music taste and hobbies and interests. While learning these things can help find common ground, they do not make you know someone’s personality. When you leave messaging to go on too long before arranging a meeting, your imagination starts to fill in the gaps, making you think that you know the person better than you actually do.

How To Capitalise On Meeting Your Date Quickly

Meeting someone soon after getting in touch does not have to be a dangerous situation. It’s possible to have a safe first date by meeting in a popular café in the middle of the day and sharing a quick coffee. Café meets are an excellent way to find out if there is a spark between you and your date without spending money on an expensive date. Remember that safety should always be considered and while a busy café is a safe place for a date make sure to check in with a friend before and after and make sure you can get home safely by yourself.

A coffee date that happens quickly after first connecting means that you don’t have the time to build the date up to be something it is not, or be anxious or self-conscious about it. While messaging is fun and can give you flutters every time you receive a message from your love interest, the chemistry and feel-good vibes you get when you do meet your match far outweighs the waiting game.

So what are you waiting for? Ask that special person out today!

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